Second time parenting
Have you ever wondered, if given a second chance, you would do things differently? Yes I have, many times. Specifically about parenting and how to raise my baby. With Al, I was totally blind (and still is). I thought that I was prepared, I have read different parenting books and articles, I have attended parenting classes and discussion, still, when Al arrived, I felt like I was drowned, suffocated and scared. But I wing it, and made it... alive. I made mental note about things that I've learned from raising Al, things that I wish I did not do or do.
As experience is the best teacher, here are the thing that I will do with Jay that I wish I'd do with Al
Three Big yet Simple Things
When Al was a newborn, I had no idea why he was crying. I tried different things to calm him down. Apparently, the reason is always these three things; he was hungry, gassy and dirty. With Jay, when he cries, I will check if he is hungry or needs to be burped or needs to be changed. No rocket science, and if these three things are well taken care of, Jay will be calm and happy and I dont have to be streesed out over nothing.
I will let Jay sleep by himself
I remembered those hours when I tried different things to put Al to sleep. I sang lullaby, I rocked him, I put him in swing, till I gave up and just nursed him to sleep, which was a big mistake. It took me months to train him to sleep by himself. This time, I will just put him in his crib while he is drowsy, give agentle pat and say "it's time to go to sleep" and no matter what, I will stick to it.
Keep things simple
The preparation I made with Al was so extra. I purchased many gears, clothes and knick knack. When I read an article mentions about things that I should get for my baby, I was sold and made a purchase rightaway. Apparently I was totally wrong. A baby does not need much, no need fancy gears and tons of clothes. As long as their basic need is met, they are good and happy. I read about how a new mother in Finlandia will receive a babybox. Everything a baby need is put in a box and they are okay. That said, I keep things simple with Jay, I only make necessary purchases, whatever handsdowns from his brother are enough for him.
Relax and enjoy the moment
A baby will cry, he will get sick and he will be fussy, it's a part of life that I cant evade. I promise my self to take a deep breathe instead of going panic, to think clearly and wisely instead of worrying. I will spend more time enjoy each moment I spend with him (and his big brother too) because oh.. how time flies and I dont want to waste it by worrying.
Take care of myself
It is easy to lose yourself when you have a baby. With Al, I was always tired, I eat poorly, I did not exercise, I did not take care of my self well. I had low energy level, I was hungry most of the time, my skin was dull and dry, it was horrible. As a result, I got the blues, I remember that I cried when Al was crying, because I was so tired and I did not know what to do. Now, I fully aware that if I take care of my self well, I am in control and I can take care of my family better. I make time to exercise, even for only 15 minutes. I do my skin routine dilligently everynight, thinking that it is a me time where I can unwind and pamper my self. I tried to eat well, more fruits and veggies, eventhough I still eat 2-3 cookies here and thre just because. I try to keep things balance, and I feel good about it, I feel like I am on top of my game and I feel that I am in control.